Maybe the world is going to hell in a handbasket.
A big frosted one.
Okay, so I'm just kidding about the frosted basket thing. But the issue really shouldn't be sugar-coated. They're ridiculous, these flavors. Ridiculous.
2 years ago
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Happy Saturday With Frosting On Top
Remember when the standard toaster pastry didn't have icing? I really think that used to be the case...or maybe that's just what my mom lead me to believe. I always thought only special Pop Tarts were frosted. I don't often buy toaster pastries, Pop-Tart or otherwise, but in a rare lapse of nutritional judgment I did so recently. Twice. And I was astonished at how difficult it was to find unfrosted ones. The boxes I bought (conveniently) came with a Pop-Tart flavor card on the inside of the carton (presumably to mark off the ones you try) and I was disgusted at the flavor options they offer. Here's the lowdown (because I know you're all as interested in this as I), Ten of the 27 flavors are fruit flavors (and this is counting Frosted Strawberry, Unfrosted Strawberry, and 20% Fiber Strawberry as individual flavors), four include fruit- at least in the title: Strawberry Milkshake, Apple Strudel, Chocolate Banana Split, and Blueberry Muffin. And out of 27 flavor options...only three are unfrosted: Strawberry, Blueberry, and Brown Sugar Cinnamon. Brown Sugar Cinnamon? Really? You can get UNFROSTED Brown Sugar Cinnamon, but Raspberry and Cherry are only available with frosting...and sprinkles? Maybe I wouldn't be so flabbergasted if Pop-Tarts didn't tout their product as a breakfast food...for children...and then offer flavors like (I kid you not) Frosted Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough. Yeah, you read that right... FROSTED CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE DOUGH POP-TARTS. Also available are Frosted Hot Fudge Sundae, Frosted Chocolate Fudge, Frosted Cookies and Creme, Frosted Chocolate Chip and Frosted S'mores (you can also get the Chocolate Fudge with 20% Fiber...for the health conscious, I guess?) This is what's wrong with the world...(among other things). I shudder when I think of the day Frazier can ask for things at the grocery store...like Frosted Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Pop-Tarts. Because I'm not buying them. I draw the line there. What is the world coming to, I ask you? It's a sad state of affairs if you ask me, the day kids' breakfast food comes in flavors adults should be embarrassed to buy in ice cream.
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I just tried the smores one for the first time a few weeks ago...Seriously, delicious. Like really.
ReplyDeleteIronically enough, on my "list of things to buy in the States" I have strawberry PopTarts. Unfrosted, of course. Right under Mini Banana Moon Pies, Nilla wafers, and Jif Extra Crunchy peanut butter. Belgian kids are definitely missing out. Or not. PopTarts really should still all be unfrosted. There used to be a law that said that, you know.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, hilarious. Wouldn't you like to know the company's process behind new flavors of pop tarts? Remember that little girl we saw in Florida that time picking out her ice cream cone flavors? She chose like, lemon sherbet, chocolate and blue bubblegum, and she said "yummy" when she tried it? Maybe she now heads up the brainstorming committee to develop 10 new poptart flavors every year.
ReplyDeleteAlton Brown actually did a segment where he made his own. He did blackberry, I think. Might be worth a try. I have found that it usually works with my kids if I tell them something's not on the shopping list
ReplyDeleteWhen I taught, the kids who were crawling underneath their desks were the ones that I usually thought...I bet he had pop tarts for breakfast. Kids need some protein at breakfast or else they go loco.
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